Sunday, October 10, 2010

Gay Marriage

Still on the subject of marriage - I was out at dinner the other night with my friend OH, and two friends of his. I'd known that the two guys we were meeting were a gay couple (one I'd met before). We both found out when we got there that they'd actually gotten married the day before Proposition 8 passed in California. And they were such a great advertisement for the cause of gay marriage - both lovely people, they'd been going out for over 15 years, easily finishing each other's stories and and clearly very happy around each other. It's such a different side of gay culture than the multiple-partner promiscuity that (rightly or wrongly) is often associated with being gay.

The big question to my mind is this. For gay marriage, I can see what's in it for the gay community. I think that their ultimate aim is not marriage per se, but a society where being gay is treated no differently than being heterosexual, and this is a part of that push.

But I can't see what's in it for the individual gay men. At the moment, they're currently getting the following benefits:

-No pressure to pop the question. "Geez Bob, I'd love to get married and guarantee never to be with anyone else, but this damn homophobic society won't let us!'

-No nagging questions about the same from busybody friends and relatives.

-Long-term relationships end in a weekend, not in a harrowing drawn-out years-long court procedure that costs tens of thousands of dollars in legal fees and increases acrimony all round.

-Long-term relationships end without you losing half your stuff.

-Long-term relationships end without you having to make ongoing payments, possibly in perpetuity, for the privilege that you used to be married to the person .

And you're trading this for what? The right to pay more taxes, and some reduced hassles in the case of hospital visits and death?

Wise up, gays! You don't realise how good you have it, and you're fighting to throw it away!

Gay Marriage:

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