"We think you should do a duet with Santana".
Nah man, it'll really kick-start your career again!
It's the surest possible sign that your career peaked a couple of years ago, and the best you can hope for from here on out is playing 6 nights a week at an off-strip hotel in Vegas and drinking yourself to an early grave, with a possible appearance on 'Where Are They Now?'.
Check out these depressing odds for duets he did with artists that I've at least heard of:
| Name | Known For | Duet Year | Done Anything Worthwhile Since? |
| Rob Thomas | Push, 3am (1996) | 1999 | Released lots of shitty songs, 'Lonely No More' peaked at 5 on US charts but was still awful |
| Everlast | What It's Like (1998) | 1999 | No singles made Billboard charts, career death in slow motion |
| Eric Clapton | Layla (1971), Tears in Heaven (1992), lots of other good stuff | 1999 | No, but he's still cool |
| Lauryn Hill | The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill (1998) | 1999 | Crashed and burned on second album, now hides from publicity |
| Wyclef Jean | Killing Me Softly (with the Fugees, 1996) | 1999 | Ran For President of Haiti and got universally mocked, filed for bankruptcy |
| Dave Matthews | Crash, 7x Platinum (1996) | 1999 | Yep, he's still got it. 2002's Busted Stuff was a great album |
| Michael Jackson | Billie Jean (1983), Bad (1987), Liberian Girl (1987), Black or White (1991), kicking ass | 2001 | Released some crap songs and then died, thereby making lots of people who'd called him a pedophile for the past decade pretend they'd liked him all along |
| Seal | Crazy (1992), Kiss From a Rose (1995) | 2002 | May as well not have |
| Chad Kroeger (of Nickelback) | How You Remind Me (2001) | 2002 | Album "All the Right Reasons" had commercial success. Got pelted with rocks during a heavy metal concert in Portugal in 2009, caused millions of LOLs as a result |
| Michelle Branch | All You Wanted (2002) | 2005 | Played 'All You Wanted' at concert, said 'Now here's something from my latest album..', whole crowd left (N.B. I have no specific evidence that this happened, but honestly, would you be willing to bet against me on this one?) |
| Steve Tyler (Aerosmith) | Walk This Way (1975), Don't want to miss a thing (1998) | 2005 | Continued to be despised by the other members of Aerosmith |
| Kirk Hammet (Metallica) | One (1989), Enter Sandman (1991), Nothing Else Matters (1992) | 2005 | Kept bitching that people were illegally downloaded his music, found that the strategy of suing your fans is not commercially viable |
The second worst phone call is 'We'd like you to do a duet with Tom Jones'. I leave you to compile that list yourself.
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